He cries at sad movies
We're all too busy sniffling through Beaches for the billionth time to notice that he's welling-up up but believe us, even the burliest boys get a lump in their throat at that point in the flick when Bambi's mum comes a cropper or when E.T goes home. So that's why they're called 'man-size' Kleenex eh?
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He likes adult entertainment
We turn a blind eye to their night time computer habits but actually, most of us really aren't fussed that our men watch porn from time to time. They sneak around like we'd chop off their joystick if they got caught having a fiddle with the mouse but as long as the best of their loving is saved for us, we really don't mind.
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He fantasises about you and your BFF getting it on
Your best mate is beautiful and yes, come to think of it, very sexy, but the thought of getting intimate with her is just hilarious. It's his own make-believe flick featuring you, and that's no bad thing, but actually it's guaranteed he'd be pretty annoyed / freaked out if you actually jumped her bones.
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He worries about the size of his manhood
When he's creating fireworks with you between the sheets it seems he's as confident as Dirk Diggler about his length and girth. However, don't be surprised if you find him looking worriedly at his flaccid chap on occasion or that those 'penis enlargement' e-shots don't automatically get directed to his junk mail.
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He still lives with his parents
Have you still yet to see his alleged bachelor pad? Has he always made excuses to come back to yours or whisked you off for more than one romantic getaway? That's because he lives with his parents. There are excusable reasons for this but if he's over 30 and hasn't ever flown the nest, he should rightly be embarrassed.
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He thinks he's puny
You've only ever seen him as an Adonis but he thinks he's a weed. From time to time you might catch him pulling some Mr Universe flex poses in front of the mirror or you'll notice a new shiny set of dumbells appear in your home but as long he knows he can beat you in an arm wrestle his worries should be allayed.
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You'll never quite live up to his Mum
Cooking a mean roast on Sunday, washing his underwear and loving him with all your might still doesn't make you as wonderful as his Mum. Don't even bother to try and negotiate a place next to her in his heart, there isn't room. Not that he'd ever tell you that of course, Mum's the word.
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He cheated on his ex
If you knew that he'd done the dirty on his old flame you'd understandably be a little nervous of his cheating heart. Therefore, rather than raise your suspicions, admit that he once made a mistake and have to explain that he feels far more strongly about you than he ever did about your predecessor, he keeps schtum.
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He loves Desperate Housewives
Despite bitching and whinging through entire episodes of Lipstick Jungle and Desperate Housewives he still seems to sit there watching every minute and following plot lines from week to week. We bet he even watches the repeats when you're out on the town with the girls.
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His friends are bad lads
Getting up to no good, sleeping around and brawling, his friends are naughty boys. He's known them for yonks and even though they've drifted apart somewhat, he loves them despite their lewd behaviour. So, it makes sense that he doesn't want you to know what they get up to in case you judge him by the company he keeps.
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